Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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