Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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