I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize