a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
