goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
