can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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