Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
