Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
