i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Randomize
