alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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