ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It's just like the Real World with babies
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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