OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
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