Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
