Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
