you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
