so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Dignity is for republicans.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
