I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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