Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
