but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
