You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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