i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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