She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
