I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
