u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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