His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
