love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
