it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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