You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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