I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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