My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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