in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
