I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
