its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
