On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
