I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
