Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
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