bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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