The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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