Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
