Don't you send me to vm
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
