Well douche your snatch and let's go!
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
