I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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