that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
