please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
