you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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