Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
