I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize
