hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
