I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Your tits are I can't wait for
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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