It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
